So one day in April, the day my husband was leaving for Nepal for a two week mountain unicycle event (yes that’s a thing), I felt like my left breast felt different, like that firm area behind the nipple was larger than the right. And the nipple seemed more flat. I thought “huh,” that’s weird. One doctor appointment, ultrasound, mammogram and biopsy later, I’ve got invasive lobular carcinoma. Yes I get mammograms faithfully, but lobular masses are sneaky and hard to detect. And they don’t feel like a cyst, but a thickening of tissue. I am not a medical professional, and things I relate are specific to me and my personal experiences. I chose not to tell the husband until he got back from Nepal-what could he do halfway across the world? When I picked him up at the airport I broke down and he surmised that our 14 year old dog had died. When I told him no it’s cancer, mine, he seemed to react like I did when the radiologist was performing my ultrasound and said “it’s a mass.” That was the moment when I felt like there was my life before that statement, and everything after. I am going to chronicle my thoughts, feelings and experiences here, uncensored, kind of like journaling in the modern world.